I believe that everything is on a continuum.
I’m not a big fan of ultimatums and don’t think people are simply one way or the other. There are at least 50 Shades of Grey. On one end is death, the other, complete aliveness. Most of us fall somewhere in the middle, and I believe that applies to training as well.
I have been striving to be completely awake. Training like never before, pushing my body to the limits in pursuit of ultimate bliss. I can honestly say that I feel better than I have in years. The workouts have been intense and often. I have been completing several of them, but not all.
The guys I’m training with are amazing inspiration. No less than 8 times I have laid in bed before a Saturday or Sunday workout and contemplated texting them with some kind of excuse. Each time I have resisted and shown up. That is because of them.
On the other hand, they are way further ahead of me and I am trying to keep up with their schedules. When I say “way further” I mean at least a year and that is a huge time frame when I look at the progress I’ve made since I started running last January.
Ironman is gonna be dicey for me. There is no question about it. I will have literally risen from the ashes in just over a year and a half to tackle one of the toughest races known to man. It is a major challenge, and I embrace every second of the pain.
But I realize that I have to do this at my pace. I am constantly thinking about Ironman and what it’s going to cross the finish line. Time is only one factor. I know that will likely be between 13 and 17 hours. I also want to do it without breaking.
Swimming, biking, and running for 13 hours was the furthest thing from my mind a year ago. Even when I finally understood what an Ironman was, I couldn’t even comprehend it. Now, I can.
At this point I believe I could complete a half Ironman. It would be torture, but I think I have it in me. That leaves 201 days to double that distance and do it in a way where I am actually happy with my time. It almost feels like I’ll need the stars to align or something, but I’m trusting the path and trusting that subtle things will change.
I need to start getting to bed and waking earlier. I need to sleep sounder and eat better. I need to build strength and confidence. I need stay focused. I need to believe.
So, when I reject workouts, I believe I am doing the right thing for my body. The last thing I want is injury or burnout. I want to build slowly, but with a tinge of pushing the boundaries. I have to build and grow. Then build and grow some more. I’m nowhere near ready, but I will be. And, the bottom line to all of this is, I really want to write a book called, “How I slept my way to an Ironman.”