Dejected. Reflected. Redirected.

The following is another guest post from our inspiring coach, Robbie Bruce.  I am continually amazed by his passion, and even more impressed with how he re-directs fires that appear to burn out of control. 

Dejected. Reflected. Redirected. 

A few of you may be aware that I have been suffering from a severe case of Achilles tendinitis over the past 2 weeks. The same kind that sidelined me from running in 2011 for almost 3 months. So, rewind almost 2 weeks ago. I had the best 2 bike and run workouts of my life with New Orleans 70.3 just over 3 weeks away. I proved to myself that the fitness I knew I needed to accomplish my goals was there. In the bank. I woke up Saturday morning. Legs and arms trashed from 4,000 yds, 70 hard bike miles and 10 hard miles of running in a 24 hour span. I was staring at a 4 hour ride, yet, I was pumped for it. Which spoke volumes to me about where my mind was. I knew as soon as the ride started the cards the triathlon gods were about to deal me. I barely made it an hour because the pain was over a 10. I sat there for maybe over an hour….. thinking “This cant be. Im here. Im ready. Why? Why now?” Took Sunday and Monday off. Hit up PT on Tuesday for some therapy. No running or biking for the week. I was cleared to ride this past Mon/Tue and my swim has improved drastically since its all I was able to do for 9 days. Today was affectionately named DDay. I got to run. The chance to run. Cleared to run. Its 80 and sunny out. Who wouldn’t wanna run. New Orleans in next weekend and if I could even run pain free and slow I was in. Doing it. Parked my truck. Said a little prayer to the running and triathlon gods and took off. 1-2-3-4 steps,,,, Oh shit I’m back. Here I come. 6-7-8… That didn’t feel right…..14-15-16….. walking. Pain at an 11…… Water bottle hurled maybe 500ft…… Done. Walking back to my truck. Head down. Defeated….. What now? Where too? Sat in my truck. Keys not even in the ignition for air. Text a few close friends about my failed attempt and sat. I will say. I am SO VERY lucky to have such amazing friends who are so supportive and positive when all I see is failure, discontent, with no resolution in sight. The theme of responses was “Regroup. Re plan. You got this.” I hit the shower at the YMCA.. Oddly enough alot of my best thinking and thoughts are in the shower. (no comments please :)), but I swear if life were one big shower Id be a philosopher or author or something. Anyway…. my shower turned into an almost 25 minute prunefest of thoughts and planning. Right forearm over the top of my head as my forehead was pressed against the tile. I felt a lot like I did after I lost the Football State Championships my senior year. You just let the water pour over you. Close your eyes and just think back…… I formulated a plan. Got my thoughts together. Mind still racing as I got dressed. Wondering how and what do do? I put my shirt on, looked down……… Ha. It said, “ENDURE.” Made me smile. That’s it. Just “endure.” See it through. You got this. Then I thought back to when I was at Ironman Louisville. Totally dejected on the bike after feeling ill and sat out on the bike. I remember the picture Season took of me. :attached below:: it SCREAMED DEJECTION. AND DEFEAT. Then I remember what happened after. I just decided to endure it. Just endure it and see it through. A few months later after just deciding to endure I had my best race ever at Augusta. Walking downstairs to get to my truck. I passed an elderly lady struggling to just make it up the stairs and a younger gentleman in a wheelchair coming into the gym……. What was I doing with my head down. It could be so much worse. So much worse. Then I got ill and pissed. I usually do that when I get really motivated. In a “this wont stop me way.” The triathlon god Zeus maybe trying to shut me down. Deject me. Discourage me. He wants a war. Hes got one. I’m pretty sure a battle from Poseidon (Ποσειδῶν, Poseidōn)(who I will all as myself. In no God but he suited me best) God of the sea, rivers, floods, droughts, earthquakes, and the creator of horses; known as the “Earth Shaker”.The horse and the dolphin are sacred to him. Right now Zeus is reigning over on of my sports. But hes in for a battle. My battle plan is the following:

– I will swim for as long and as hard as possible every week. I will get so fast. You will not even get close to catching my feet. I will gain time.

– I will bike as long and as much as I need to. The bike is my weakest so  I will focus on my strength and my weakness during this undetermined down time. I will get better. I will get faster.

–  I will drop more weight. I am down 10 lbs in the last 3.5 weeks. I will cut more which will make me a faster and more efficient runner when I am finally able to run. It will make me faster all around.

– I will hit the StairMaster (if cleared) as much as I can. In pants and a hoodie. Ill get mentally stronger, physically stronger, and lighter. Ill be meaner too.

– Ill do as much therapy that is required. Ill have needles shoved in me. Ill do endless clam shell exercises till I start spitting out pearls like a damn sprinkler.

– The times few hours I might miss hanging with my little man training, Ill use to take him out with me on my new paddle board. Enjoy more time with him. Which makes everyone better all around.

– I’m not going to plan on “racing” until June (Kansas 70.3) or July (Munice 70.3). I don’t wanna focus on short term possibilities but instead long term realistic goals. A miracle could happen and I might toe the line at NOLA but the same possibility looms that I may miss Gulf Coast. I’m OK with that. Because no matter when I come back. Im coming back with a mother@#*&$ng vengeance.

– In the mean time. When Im not biking or on the StairMaster. Ill be focused on this:

http://www.panamericanmasters2013.org/. I swimming the best in FOREVER. I have time to focus on it and I am familiar with the course. This Tennessee boy is headed down south to play with some of the best.

That’s it. Getting better is always a fluid situation. I could recover much earlier or a lot later. Who knows. I however do know that in the mean time. I still have goals. I will still be working and training hard. I will still be focused and when I come back 100%. Move out of the way. So if you see me don’t tell me “I’m sorry your hurt.” I’m not hurt. Ive redirected. Don’t pitty me bc I’m not going to pitty me. Ive got this. So the question is……. For all of you 100% healthy people…….. Whats your plan? Are you focused? Are you giving it 100%? If not. Start now because before you know it. The chance to give it may be stripped away from you. Then what?

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