By Mike Tarrolly, Co-Host of the Crushing Iron Podcast
My niece, Maggie, captured this shot of me and it took me right back to Ironman mornings and the feeling that comes along with staring into the longest and most difficult day of our year. I like to call it walking the plank, because about 30 minutes from this photograph, there was no turning back.
Sleep is my number one priority on race night, and thankfully I did pretty well at Wisconsin. I’ve literally had nights where I’ve slept one or two hours max before Ironman. It’s the worst feeling in the world. Tired, angry, and facing something that will test every bone and mental fiber in your body.
I remember what I was thinking about in the above photo. It was time to escape and get my mind wrapped around what was next. Those 30 minutes fly by and if I’m not mentally in the water at this point, things can go to shit in a hurry. I took my time with the wetsuit, talked a little, then went into my solitary confinement.
While all signs pointed to perfect weather, I was still guarded because of last year. I remember being in the swim line in pouring rain and wind. The temperature was about 52 degrees and Mike Reilly was trying to pump us up. He was right next to me shouting “It’s gonna be a great day and you’re all gonna finish!” Then, he turned off his microphone and said to a few of us, “I can’t believe this is going to be the weather all day long.” And it was.
It rained the entire day. It took me two hours longer than normal on this course. I tried to look for bright spots, but the entire day sucked. It was a terrible feeling looking out at that water, KNOWING you didn’t want to race, but had to go through with what you started.
I knew I would finish, and I knew it would steal part of my soul. I was sleepless and pissed. But, somehow, I figured out a way to twist my mind. I saw the future. I knew it would be the most brutal day, but when I was done, I would have that accomplishment forever. That was my carrot.
This year I felt totally different. Rested, staring at perfect weather. Knowing I had a shot at the podium if I played my cards right. I’d need about a 12:30 race to do just that and have three 12 hour or less times posted at Ironman Wisconsin.
I put my mind in the swim and knew the whole objective was to keep going and not cook myself. Swim first, bike second. But the bike was tugging at me.
I know the course pretty well and was really optimistic about a solid split that would give me a good chance at running around a 4:30. I felt great out of the water and amazing for the first 38 miles of the bike. Until I flatted and all hell broke loose.
That story is in my race recap. I spent 40 minutes on the side of the road. Once again my mental strength would be tested.
The flat and C02 mishaps had me frazzled, but somehow I got back on the bike and went for it. I pushed way too hard and it bit me, but I’m glad I didn’t play it safe.
Facing a marathon when you can barely walk is not the best place to be, but I kept looking for ways. I never did get the run going, but never stopped trying.
That’s everything with endurance training and racing. We have this strange belief that it’s not hard, but all it is is hard! Just because we had a great stand alone run two months ago does not equate into a solid marathon after a swim and bike.
This sport is at least half mental. “That was hard!” Yeah, no shit. It’s hard for everyone because it’s relative to your training and talent. You have to figure out a way to get it done. Then, go back to the drawing board to get it done faster. But that doesn’t mean it will be easier. It’s always hard and the more you go through it, the tougher you get.