As if the corporate world doesn’t brainwash you enough? They are positioning this as a new “healthy lifestyle break room.” Works for me.
Ironman Augusta 70.3
In three days, two of my friends will hit the downstream current in Augusta 70.3 Half Ironman. Both will also join me in Madison at Ironman Wisconsin.
We all ran together with the East Nasties last night and it just pumps me up to see the look in their eyes. Excited, clear, yet a bit distant. A 1.2 mile swim, 56 mile bike, and a half marathon are lurking. Both know they are ready, but for various reasons this will be a legit test.
Jim was recently battling a bacteria infection he picked up in the last river he raced and it has taken a toll on his training. I’m sure it will be in the back of his mind as he takes the Augusta plunge. Daniel is coming off a pretty serious bike accident four weeks ago that sidelined all workouts for a couple weeks and still limits movement in his shoulder.
Jim has been a motivational force from the beginning. He jogged along with me at an 11 minute pace, and I now realize what a sacrifice that was. It’s satisfying to help others, but when you’re training for a race, which he often was, it can be a burden. He also paced me for my first 5k, willingly accepting a chip time that would linger on the internet forever and be well under his potential. He also lent me a bike to explore triathlons. Someday I will erect a statue of Jim next to my infinity pool.
The first time I met Daniel was after one of his Sprint Tris. I was there to soak it all in and see if this was really something I wanted to do. At some point that day I fell in love with the idea of doing a triathlon and it may have had something to do with Daniel’s post-race excitement. He was ear to ear grin and just couldn’t hide how pumped he was about what he’d just done. We didn’t talk much that day, but have become friends since. I look forward to his positive energy on our journey to Wisconsin.
I really want to go watch these guys race and know how much that helps, but a 7 hour drive on Sunday while having to work on Monday is a bit much for me. Time is more valuable than ever, it seems.
Side note: The co-worker next to me has the fucking Andy Griffith them for a ring tone and always leaves his phone in the office. It rings constantly and I cannot thwart the whistling loop that takes over my brain for 3-4 hours a day.
I think I’m finally getting used to my new fucking tri bike. That whole deal with the aero bars has been cramping my style. Literally. My neck felt like it was in some kind of illegal wrestling hold as I’d peer above my glasses while bugs flew in my eyes. 
Tonight was better. I did about 15 miles of rolling short hills at about 17mph on average. I’ll take that for now as long as I can get my back, neck, and thighs used to a funky new position. When I got home my dog barked at me.
Todays Diet:
Breakfast: Protein shake, coffee
Lunch: Pizza, pasta, salad
Snack: Fiber bar, Green Tea
Dinner: Protein shake, 2 pickles, green perfect food.
Still going with the flow.
My First Triathlon Swim
You gotta start somewhere and this was from my first Sprint, in the Music City Triathlon. It’s funny how I look back on this now and think it wasn’t really that tough, but I was supremely intimidated by the idea. To swim in the Cumberland River for 400 meters with a “wicked” current had me shakin’ a little bit. And really, I don’t remember much from that swim except gasping for air and wondering what the fuck I was doing. There were about 600 people in the race and we did a timed start, so it wasn’t really congested, but you still taste a lot of feet.
I tried to get into the mindset of a Navy Seal as I navigated the dark and murky waters. Luckily I learned that you have to swim upstream to get straight across, so I buried my head after the last marker and dug in for Opryland. When I looked up, I was STILL below my exit point and scurried like a dog to get back to the pier. The swim took me something like 6:45, but it seemed like I spent a lifetime in that river.
Pace, Distance, Speed
It’s probably not a big deal to you, but this triathlon calculator is my version of Farmville.
Lunch: Cheeseburger with lettuce and tomato, fries, un-sweet tea, mint (The Southern Nashville)
(I entered “Cheeseburger” into the triathlon calculator and it locked up).
Going International
I now have a reader (or at least someone who landed on my page by accident) from Switzerland. And for that, I am stoked. Welcome, my friend.
The European penetration is nice, but I won’t be fully satisfied until I add Latvia to the list. After that it’s Operation Asia.
"You Are An Ironman" the Book
I’ve been reading Jacques Steinberg’s book “You Are An Ironman” for the last few weeks before I go to bed. He follows 6 triathletes for about a year as they train for Ironman Arizona. It took me a few nights to get into the read because it seemed a bit big-wordy and journalistic rather than conversational (yes, I’m a bit lazy and shallow), but now I am immersed in the characters and am finding tons of motivation and training fodder.
Some of my biggest questions right now are things like when and where should you do other races while training for an Ironman. I think it’s obvious to do a 1/2 Iron when you’ve worked up to those distances in your plan, but what about the other stuff? Like right now, I am genuinely still building myself as an endurance athlete and debating whether or not I should do the Huntsville Marathon on December 8th.
My furthest run to date was my first 1/2 marathon (2:14) back in April (after starting running in January). Since then I have consistently popped off 2-3 runs a week ranging from 3-8 miles and feel pretty good about any of those distances. In fact, I’m pretty sure I could do a 1/2 in under 2 hours right now. But a marathon will surely squeeze my bones and muscles like nothing I’ve ever done and I’m wondering whether or not I should push the envelope right now. The last thing I want to do is lose my enthusiasm, which I feel I’ve built by staying within myself. But I guess doing a marathon is no different than saying you’re going to do an Ironman, you just have to get ready. I think my plan is to run a hilly half distance (using the infamous Flying Monkey course) this weekend and make my decision.
The other thing I really like about “You Are An Ironman” is the training decisions these athletes are making. One of the women has a strategy of always running after the bike. Even if it’s a mile or two. If you’ve ever done a “brick” (running after biking) you know how strange it can feel and there has to be something for getting used to it. As hard as the practice sounds, I am going to do my best to add that routine.
I’m also amazed at the amount of swimming they do. I love swimming, but the process of getting in the water is a little annoying at times. Especially if you’re talking about open water swims and having some kind of support while you flail your way into the middle of a lake. After doing an Olympic, I realize how far I have to go on the swim. If nothing else, just to feel relaxed and comfortable in the water at the start. I literally could not catch my breath for the first 10 minutes, and that is not a good feeling when you’re in a rushing river with waves crashing down your throat.
So, tonight I will run with One Hilly 5K with the East Nasties, then talk with a couple of the guys training for Wisconsin about their 1/2 Iron this weekend in Augusta. Thursday, I’ll get back in the pool, then Saturday run half of the Flying Monkey to make up my mind about Huntsville.
Today’s Diet (so far)
Breakfast – Protein Shake, Coffee, bagel with cream cheese
Ehh… I know. it’s gonna take time!
Trying To Understand Swimming
You just stroke, then breathe and it never leaves a bad taste like masturbation.
Swimming is the perfect escape and reconnection. A body made of water flowing through itself. I have yet to find an exercise more invigorating.
Tonight I knocked out a mile in 35 minutes or so and that is not gonna cut it. I suppose it would help if I actually knew how to swim, but I can’t seem to figure it out on my own.
Making matters worse was the woman in the next lane teaching her little girl how to swim. The woman didn’t really look like a swimmer, but she was throwing around a lot of “thumbs first” and “keep hands away from face” kinda stuff, and my end-of-lane-breaks were couched with that “acting like I wasn’t listening look” but I was definitely listening.
I’ve watched a bunch of videos and read books, newsletters, encyclopedias, Twitter posts, and DVR’d the Olympics, but I can’t quite tell which of my growing array of styles is faster. It doesn’t help that I can’t see the second hand on the clock because I’m getting old and blind (maybe I need to cut back on the masturbation).
Anyway, if anyone has swimming advice, I’m all ears.
Today’s Diet
Breakfast: Protein Shake, Two cups of coffee
Snack: Fiber bar
Lunch: Two pieces of fried cod, french fries, unsweet tea
Snack: Chips, green tea
Pre-swim: Orange juice, blueberry, strawberry, banana smoothie (blender)
Dinner: Kale, broccoli, carrot, apple, ginger (in juicer)
* I’m sure I’ll ad something else solid to this day. Likely a can of tuna and a few pickles.
Summary: This is not the most impressive diet-day, but I’m not avoiding my cravings and they are naturally fading away. It’s pretty sweet to see the change and not have to depend on willpower.
NFL Replacement Refs
I know this isn’t directly related to Ironman, but bear with me. Last night I watched the end of the Packers/Seahawks game and all of the outrage that followed. I was literally taken back by the level of hostility and it occurred to me that my training has given me a different outlook on competition.
For years I have ranted and raved about football or any other sport if my team got the shaft. I was either furious or bummed or ridiculously elated. I can feel all of those emotions sort of drifting away.
Running, biking, and swimming are all very competitive without the rage. I have especially noticed how runners support each other, and while I’m sure there is always some envy, there is always underlying tone of encouragement. Even I was joining in and it was all very natural.
I was oddly inspired when friends beat me en route to their personal bests. It’s kind of like going to see a band if you’re a musician. If they suck you are inspired because you know you can do better. If they are great, they bring up your game and push you to work harder. Either way you respect what just happened and the band’s efforts. Their drive to “do something” . . . explore life.
Last night after the obvious blown call in the Packers’ game, I read post after post calling for the NFL commissioners head. It was literally like these replacement referees had ruined their lives. It was sad and made me reflect on the concept of controlling your own life and circumstances without regard to what others are doing.
I couldn’t help but think that the Packers (and their MVP quarterback) had a chance to change the outcome and keep the referees out of their destiny. They had the ball with 2:00 left and all they had to do was get a first down and run out the clock. Instead, their running back fumbled the hand off and they lost 4 yards on the first play. Then ran two giveaways up the middle before punting with a minute left. The Seahawks got the ball back at the 50 yard line. I’m pretty sure the MVP quarterback would have relished that situation.
Sure there are bad breaks in games. Blown calls, distractions, brain farts. But the beauty of competing against yourself in swimming, biking, or running is, you can only blame yourself . . . and there is a lot of power there. You are on a quest to be better, excel, and reach something deeper inside, which can be endless fuel if you embrace it.
I played team sports for years and one of the first things I was taught in baseball was, “Never blame the game on an umpire.” This is a hard pill to swallow when a key call is blown late in the game, but life is fluid. You can’t worry or complain about stuff you can’t control. You prepare the best you can and accept the results. There is no reason not to. It’s bad for your soul.
My Couch To Ironman History
I just recorded my first video blog for this site and will put it up as soon as I make a cool open and close that energizes, inspires, and/or makes me look like a total egomaniac. In the meantime, here’s a little history on my couch to Ironman journey.
So, what’s my story? I am a forty something young gentleman who, with the help of a certified Ironman, started running on January 23, 2012. I’m sure we made some kind of bet, but the true reason was how I looked in a video last November (which I hope to find and post). I looked like a fucking whale as I sat next to my buddy Roger and sang the University of Wisconsin anthem, “Varsity.” We were absolutely rocked off our ass and waving our arms back and forth (feeling pretty cool I might add) acting like we were in college celebrating another Badger victory. But when I saw the iPhone video I could not get over the fact that I had a beer gut and my face was swollen like I’d been sitting in a bar for the last 5 years, which I was. I tried to downplay it, like it was the angle of the shot, but I made a serious mental note that day that I would not take my slobby ass lightly.
The start of my running was a “Couch to 5K” program that started with 60 second runs surrounded by 90 second walks. I shit you not, those 60 seconds were like climbing Mount Helena to me. I was winded like a bitch, but tried to play it cool because there were a bunch of women around me and, I’m not going to lie, that is motivation.
This went on and on and we slowly built to a 5K on St. Patrick’s Day which I ran in just under my goal of 28 minutes because my Ironman coach who ran with me lied the whole way. “We’re way behind, gotta pick it up.”
This was me and the coach
So, I lumbered onward completing a 5 mile, 10k, 1/2 Marathon, a Sprint triathlon, numerous other 5ks, then an Olympic triathlon, which was nearly the end of my quest for iron.
Ironman Wisconsin: Registration Day
Let me tell you, if Ironman Wisconsin is anything as stressful as “registration” for Ironman Wisconsin, I am in deep shit.
Registration opened the day after the race at noon and I was reading stories around the web that said it could sell out in as fast as 15 minutes. There were five of us signing up and I was a wreck thinking that I might be the only one to not get in. It didn’t help that my boss called an 11:00 am meeting out of the blue.
Like most bosses, he is a big fan of hearing himself talk and this strategy session had me glued on the clock. I thought I was good, but he opened a can of worms at 11:47. It wasn’t much of a stretch to act like I was sick and run out of that office at noon, because I was getting queasy.
His can of worms was flying right over my head, and at 11:59 I stood up and declared the meeting over. He looked at me like I was crazy (and I probably was) and asked where I was going. I said I had something to do and that the rest of them were more than qualified to finish the meeting.
It was a bold move and I’m sure there was probably enough subordination to get fired, or at least a red flag in my file, but I didn’t care. I would have quit at that moment and, as it turns out, still might.
It’s not just the Ironman that has me thinking about walking from the corporate world, it’s what the quest stands for. Getting to the point where I actually believe I can do a full Ironman is a major change in my thought patterns. I am turning into a different person, and that person is me.